March 21, 2008

  • Growing Long Hair for Men

    Long Hair: A Man’s Perspective

    Part 1

     

    First, a Word

     

    This will inaugurate the first of my entries on my
    xanga with it open to the public again. Expect, of course, all public entries
    not to be too overly personal: if you like my entries, my site, and myself,
    please feel free to request <echoing voice> protected ACCESS
    <end echoing voice>. Yes, you too can have entry into my super-top-secret
    thoughts, but you have to ask… nicely… and you also have to have a xanga site.
    The worst that could happen is I say a polite no, right? It’s not like I plan
    to hunt you down like the dog you are, drop a hydrogen bomb on your new car,
    and then decorate your dog with Christmas lights… right? Hey, why are you
    running away? What did I say?

     

    Why Guys Grow It

    Now, for my thoughts on growing long hair as a guy.
    You should know, firstly, that I this is coming from the perspective of a man
    who has had short hair all his life and never grown it at all until now.
    I started at the age of late twenty six, and now I am about to turn twenty eight.
    It has been over a year since I chose to grow it out- and it was longer than
    usual when I started, anyway. I am a stay home Dad of a two year old, and a
    husband- and since I am in my twenties, I do not fall into the typical “long
    hair bracket”. What is said bracket, you say? Well, it’s just my opinion, but
    let’s look:

     

    1.           
    Boys and Teenagers: It’s the ‘cool thing’, it’s the thing that
    gets girls… look more like a girl and the girl’s will like you, right? They’ll
    forget about the fact that technically boys mature at a slower rate than girls
    and are much more interested in ‘that one thing’ than girls. It also has a nice
    rebel quality at this age.

    2.           
    College students: Well, it’s a hang-over from bracket one.
    It’s cool, and the look by college has a ‘matured cool’ look to it and tends to
    define a whole personality. Long hair at this point, for a guy, is not so much
    rebellious as it is a statement.

    3.           
    Men who had long hair at a younger age: Call it a bit of a
    long-hair hangover from bracket one and two. They’ve done it this way so long…
    well, it’s become a habit.

    4.           
    Midlife Crisis: “OH MY GOSH I’M OLD… but, no, no, no, I am NOT
    OLD, I’ll prove it! I can be young. Yes, I can act young. Look look at me, I
    may be half-bald but I still got it, I got long hair, yes I do! Haha… ahahahahahah!
    <crazy, gibbering laughter>” You get the point- the pre-requisite for
    midlife crisis is usually either significant balding, fourties and up. Some
    guys jump the gun and start in the end of their thirties because they see the
    big four zero coming.

     

    I don’t
    fall into any of those brackets, of course. I never had long hair… I’m not in
    college… I’m not going through a midlife crisis (unless you think I am planning
    on dying by the age of fifty six…) and no, you can’t wiggle me into that
    bracket because I’m not anywhere near significantly balding.

     

    I just
    felt like I wanted something different. I want to grow my hair long- I want to
    try it, just once in my life, before my hair does eventually recede to the
    point where it would be pathetic to even consider it. Balding is in my family,
    I see my hairline making it’s first feints towards the back of my skull. If
    there is a time to try- now is it!

     

    Is long hair really as hard as they say?

     

    If those
    aren’t good enough reasons, well, hey- my Wife has short hair, and I tend to
    prefer long hair. So if I can’t run my finger’s through her hair, might as well
    run them through my own. I can close my eyes and pretend it’s hers.
    <laugh> That, and once I remember her challenging me, when I was trying
    to convince her to keep long hair: “YOU just try having long hair and
    see how easy it is to care for a child with it”.

     

    <clears
    throat> So, I am caring for a two year old full time, all day long every
    weekday…  <puts up a finger> I
    have hair to my collarbone now, what would be considered a ‘shorter style’ for
    a woman but definitely not ‘short hair’ (my bangs are to my chin after all),
    and definitely long for a man <puts up another finger>

     

    I’m sorry
    ladies, I hate to shoot your argument in the foot, but… nope, long hair ain’t
    that much of a hastle at this length. Oh sure, there are some inconveniences,
    but I am actually finding that the longer my bangs grow the easier it
    gets! Yes, you know what I am talking about, the ‘ol tuck your bangs behind the
    ear trick. Though I find the way my hair frames my face is quite nice, and I
    prefer going out with that look. Also, ladies, you guys have some tricks of the
    trade that I, as a man, am not supposed to use. Of course once my hair is long
    enough, the ponytail will fix a lot of the hair in the eyes problems,
    until then using rubber-bands to hold my bangs out of my eyes, clips, any of
    that is considered unmanly and while I have done it a few times to save
    my fingers from being chopped off by a huge, extra-sharp chef’s knife or to
    vacuum… well, I certainly got laughed at by my Mom, and my Wife found it rather
    embarrassing looking. Of course I remember guys in the dorms in college would
    freely use it for convenience- they didn’t really care.

     

    So
    actually, you ladies have it easier than I do, and I still don’t find it
    that much of an inconvenience. For me, personally, it is at least as
    inconvenient as my normal ‘short hair’ length (and the short hair length most
    girls would have) and in some ways much better. The reason it is better? I have
    super oily hair. You would think long hair would make it worse, right?
    Wrong. The oil (well, most hair people would phrase it “the natural oils” so it
    sounded less gross, right?) spreads out through my hair so that I can actually
    go longer without washing it. My hair used to look icky if I did not
    wash it every single day… now? It looks great, I can go two days just fine.
    Needs a washing by day three though.

     

    Don’t make
    a face ladies, I use TWO rounds of shampoo each time I wash my hair, and then
    Tea Tree special conditioner… if I only use one round of shampoo, I couldn’t go
    to day three without it being oily.

     

    Should you grow it?

    Curly or Frizzy hair

    IF you have curly
    hair when your hair is short, frizzy hair, etc… you might not want to grow your
    hair out. Everyone has different types of hair, of course, but some types do
    better long than others. Curly and frizzy hair takes a lot more work when you
    grow it long- slightly curly is not so bad as really curly or frizzy, and
    actually looks nice… I mean, some ladies TRY to make their hair look curly. For
    a guy, curly can look good if it is not too much, but if you are going to end
    up having to straighten it… just keep it short. My nephew has curly hair and
    uses a straightening iron. BAD for your hair, and lots of work!

    IF you have
    straight hair, or when you wear it short you don’t really notice it curling,
    you should be fine. If it just curls slightly it should not be too bad, just
    keep it clean. I apparently have ‘wavy hair’ and never knew it until I grew it
    out.

     

    Cleanliness is next to godliness

    Okay guys, long
    hair- whatever you hear some people say- is a GREAT excuse not to wash your
    hair every day. Even with normally oily hair, you can go a day without washing
    it- and on a weekend or a time where you aren’t going out on the last day,
    maybe two days. This is actually encouraged for women who are growing their
    hair really long, and in a long hair guide for women they are encouraged to
    occasionally stay in on a long weekend and let their natural oils condition
    their hair. It does not look nice, but it is good for your hair. BUT LONG HAIR
    IS NOT AN EXCUSE TO BE GROSS, or DIRTY.

    If you regularly
    plan to go more than a day without washing your hair, your hair will look oily.
    At least rinse it especially if you plan on going out- and brush it daily.

    Yes guys, long
    hair = brushing it. Gotta do it. Its easy, its quick, it is a lot less
    inconvenient than washing your hair every day. Great exchange if you ask me. I
    give my personal thoughts on keeping it clean below.

     

    ALSO, long
    hair is not an excuse not to keep the rest of your body clean
    . USE
    antiperspirant and deodorant. Use it daily. Wash your face. Heck, if you have
    to, shower daily but just don’t get your hair wet. Keep clean, smell nice, most
    men NEED antiperspirant/deodorant combos. Women hate smelly men. MEN hate
    smelly men. I hate smelly men with long hair more than most.
    Especially since it seems the most smelly men I have known also have long hair.
    What a horrible stigma. If you want to smell, chop your hair short. Buzz it
    short, like a buzz-cut. Stop giving us long haired folks a bad name.

     

    Will you put reasonable effort into it?

    Brush it, go to a
    professional stylist, properly shampoo and condition it EVERY time you wash it.
    If your hair looks oily, thick, or generally crappy… give it up, it is not for
    you, cut it and keep it cut and save everyone the horror, and don’t give guys
    with long hair a bad name. It takes LESS EFFORT in some ways, you just have to
    be consistent when you do wash it. If you like to keep your hair super short,
    never brush it, never blowdry it… then no, it is more effort and you’d best
    keep it short. If you like the long hair look, and you want to try it, it’s not
    hard so long as you don’t shirk the basics. You’ll get it done faster than many
    girls, but it won’t be like having a buzz-cut.

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