January 21, 2007

• Memory Post- Conor’s Birth 03

  A continuation of my series of memory posts on the story of Conor’s birth.

  No pain, no gain… but not always

  I felt badly Kat had to go through so much
  pain, but I knew we both wanted the same thing. I wanted to stop her pain, but
  not at the risk of the baby or a healthy, normal birth. However, when I heard
  that this was just the beginning- I knew she couldn’t take it, I also knew this
  wasn’t what we were prepared for. As soon as we induced, everything changed. So
  I asked Terri about the effects- and got really good feedback. The epidural
  would probably let Kat sleep right away, her body would continue to push and work
  at the baby even with her able to rest. Since her water broke at 5 PM Thursday
  she had a time limit too- if she couldn’t give birth by 24 hours, she would
  have to look at a c-section. An epidural would give her body more energy,
  because she could rest, as well as make the pain less. Less pain would mean
  better pushes, too. As soon as I heard this, I told her to start the epidural.
  Kat only cursed at me once in the whole labour- at one point when I said no
  epidural, she said “You apple!” (ahem, apple being a more intense word, of
  course) Well, she proceeded to bless me in about as many ways as most women
  probably curse their husbands in labour. She was so relieved, even the pain
  bothered her less. They had us all leave- apparently after a husband fainted when
  an epidural was put in, they made a rule not even I could stay in. When I came
  back in, the epidural was in her back and she was already relaxing.

   

  I don’t regret waiting- I wanted to make
  the best choice, one both of us wanted. I didn’t make the choice for the
  epidural until I knew it was the best one, for sure- but I didn’t put it off
  just because of a blind desire for a natural birth. To me, the priorities were-

  1)      Healthy Mom, Healthy Baby

  2)      Vaginal birth

  3)      Natural birth

  a.      No pain meds

  b.      No induction

   

  Obviously, one you start one of these
  interventions, others start piling up. I wanted to avoid a c-section all I
  could, short of endangering Kat or her baby- we BOTH wanted this, and had
  discussed it in detail before labour was even months off. We made a birth plan,
  discussed all the details, and were ready- I knew what she wanted, so that when
  she couldn’t hold to it, I could. I’m glad Terri followed our wishes and told
  Kat “If you want it, you have to talk it over with your husband.” I realised,
  however, that at that point on Thursday afternoon, avoiding pain medication
  served no more purpose- and it might make a c-section more likely.

   

  A Breath of Fresh Air

  Thing got a LOT better. Kat was able to
  relax, the pain eased, everything was good. I went to sleep early, and so did
  she- she got a fairly good rest, I did too, and it was not until around 4 AM
  she woke up, and about after 5 AM I did. Shortly after, she had begun to feel
  some SERIOUS pushing. She was checked- they couldn’t even feel her cervix.
  Fully effaced, FULLY dilated. As soon as her body started serious pushing, the
  baby would start coming. The day before he was high- he had dropped down
  already. My Mom and Sister stayed the night at our house- which is 10 minutes
  away if traffic is clear, instead of the 40 minute drive their house in Chapin
  would have been (maybe 30 minutes if they’d driven FAST). I called them, and
  later our birth helpers Sean and Gina- and they came.

   

  Round 1: FIGHT

  Time gets a little blurry, but I know by 7
  AM she had started full second stage, pushing for the finish. Normally only two
  people, husband included, are allowed to stay for delivery. Terri, wonderful
  woman that she is, wanted my Mom to stay in as well as my sister- so it was
  three of us. I think it was partially because my Mom was a nurse, too, and knew
  what she was doing- as well as the fact Terri felt there was enough room that
  staying strictly to code wasn’t necessary.

   

  Due to the pain medication, Katrina’s
  positions were limited- mainly to her back, or sides. She stayed on her back
  with Terri, while I held one leg up and Colleen held another. Mom focused on
  the ‘north end’, putting ice on her and providing ice chips and water.
  Everytime a hard contraction would stop, Kat almost always wanted some ice
  chips- and the latex gloves filled with ice could NEVER be cold enough!

   

  She pushed a lot, and by the time she
  stopped Terri could spread the labia and we could see his head inches down- and
  the light coloured hair it had! However, Terri finally called for more epidural
  medication- she felt Kat needed to rest. It was her decision, after some time,
  that she was narrow enough that there was a 50/50 chance- at that point- that
  the baby could make it without a c-section. Kat didn’t really need to hear
  that, because she wanted him OUT and would be glad for a c-section if it just
  ended it.

   

  Terri, however, did say one thing that I
  appreciated- “This doesn’t mean it is over yet. I don’t want you to get a
  c-section and then look back and regret it, feeling you could have done better.
  I want you to try hard, so that if we do a c-section, you will know you did
  your best.” At this point her shift was over- but she had said she would stay.
  However, she came in shortly after and said that she had appointments, and
  would let Linda Ballist take over. At the time, I was very disappointed, but
  not only was Linda one that Kat really liked- she also was the most experienced
  of all the midwifes in natural birth! I believe Terri purposely handed it over,
  knowing that Linda could best accomplish what we were hoping for at this point.

  To be continued with Part 3…

  • 9:06 pm
  • 1 Comment